When your wife's ability to be calm and collected and to make everything seem so easy is making you feel small and unworthy, do what I do: Leave your socks in the middle of the floor. Nothing will unglue the "put-together" woman faster than two dirty, crunchy socks on two separate sides of the room. It allows you to see that they are actually capable of losing it.
But first, you have to test the waters to see how severe the reaction will be. When you step on the toe of your sock to take them off, and it makes that "wsssh" sound, and she perks her ears up like a dog hearing the clink of dry food hitting the food bowl, you know what's coming...But when you toss the sock from the tip of your toe to their designated place on the carpet, it's as if you just committed a war crime against an orphanage full of handicapped babies...The look of horror and anger that fills her face is glorious, as it affords you, the man, the opportunity to see someone so perfect, your wife, become completely unhinged.
Socks: The wife's kryptonite...
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